One of the interesting things about approaching child birth again is that you have been influenced by many more things then when you were an excited 1st time Mum. Some people feel the fact that you have ‘done it before’ takes away the biggest fear which is of the ‘unknown’. However, it may depend on who and what you have been influenced by particularly your own personal experience. As the saying goes ‘good news travels fast and bad news travels faster’. Mums are great at ensuring this and love to share thier bad experiences even more then thier enjoyable ones. So what can you do to get into the mood for a positive frame of mind before the big event?
- choose who you listen to. When they see you arrive with your bump and start on the epic story of the ‘hurendous’ birth of baby Johnny remember you have a choice to listen or not to listen. Can you imagine if every time you got into a car someone told you about a car accident that ‘someone once had’. You wouldn’t want to listen would you? So don’t. Change the conversation or make a dash for the hot chocolate!
- grow your own confidence Depending on how you like to learn find evidence of positive experiences that you will gain from. Reality is what you believe it to be. There are interactive forums, books, journals, support groups so every type of information is out there. The bigger question is what outcome do you want.
- relax One of the main influences of how babies develop and the birth you have, is determined by stress. Babies respond to the stress hormone cortisol at 12 weeks. That feeling being out of control. If you dont know what you want or how you are going to achieve it, then feeling in control and empowered is far more challenging. This doesn’t mean writing a thesis of a birth plan and then not doing anything else to prepare or being fixed in how its going to happen. But having a clear outcome of enjoying your pregnancy and birth, taking steps to achieve this and learning how to relax.
1st time round my baby was induced at 16 days over and I had a wonderful birth – all 21 hours of it. However I appreciate if it wasn’t for the books I read on Hypnobirthing, the class I did with my partner & the relaxation tapes I listened to months before hand, it would have been very different. This type of preparation isn’t going to suit everyone but isn’tit worth a try? To find out more form the professionals read Paulines’ article on hypnobirthing.
WARNING! being flexible is what midwives like and when you tell some you are using Hypnobirthing they may have some judgements about what you want and expect from them. This can also be the case with friends who may believe that anything less then an obstetrician at your bed side is irresponsible. So choose who you share your story with and how you share your wishes.